Courage and Kindness: Appreciation for the Girl with the Glass Slipper
Whether you know her as Ella, Cindy, Cendrillon, Aschenputtel, or even Cinderelly (Jaq and Gus Gus’s pronunciation), the story of the girl covered in ashes ascending to the throne above her cruel family has persisted through centuries. Across the globe, there are believed to be hundreds, if not thousands, of version of Cinderella that have existed throughout time. But, due to The Mouse’s power in American culture, the Disney versions are the ones people know best.
If you ask me now, I’d say Tiana from The Princess and the Frog is my favorite Disney princess, but before Tiana’s 2009 debut, I always loved Cinderella best. My grandma had the VHS of the 1950 Disney classic, and I often watched it at her house as a child, entranced by it’s chorus of heavenly voices, soft color grading and animation, and, most of all, Ilene Woods’s warm Cinderella voice. Purely out of nostalgia, if I hear this opening number from the film, tears spring to my eyes.
Just listen to these people’s voices! So beautiful!
Even though The Princess and the Frog kind of took over my psyche post-2009, my love for Cinderella was reestablished when the live-action adaptation starring Lily James was released in 2015. It took the fairytale and enhanced it, made it feel like a modern story, and had absolutely fabulous visuals and costumes. I still believe that this is the best live-action that Disney has ever made.
As of writing this, I am in the ensemble of Rodgers and Hammerstein’s Cinderella at my community theater. This musical has a special place in my heart, as I had the chance to play Ella in my senior year of high school. It was 2021, so we were still dealing with COVID, but we wanted to do a musical despite everything. A stage was constructed in front of the high school on the lawn and we managed to pull it off despite having virtually no set or backstage area. The audience brought lawn chairs to sit in, the orchestra and sound board were off to the side under a canopy, and we did our quick changes in a 16-person-size tent that lived off stage right. We persisted!
This time around, I got to play a snooty lady of the court in a big ball gown and towering wig, so that’s been fun! I’ve had a great time making new friends and returning to this community theater after years of being away due to high school shows and moving for college.
I’m thinking about Cinderella’s character quite a bit now due to being immersed in this musical the past several months, and she has always been marked by one particular attribute: kindness. Treated horribly by her stepmother and stepsisters, and having no friends other than the mice and creatures that live around the house, she cooks, scrubs, dusts, and takes all kinds of emotional and verbal abuse with patience. It is this attribute that’s also given her the most criticism.
“She should have just stood up for herself.”
“She needed outside help from the Fairy Godmother to go to the ball!”
“Her whole story focuses on her marriage to the prince. She isn’t a good example to little girls.”
These are just a few of the types of critiques I’ve seen of Cinderella online. It doesn’t surprise me; all of the older Disney princesses like Snow White or Aurora have received similar kinds of criticism. With their tiny waists and angelic voices, the original Disney princesses were kind, fair, warm-hearted, and, in all ways, lovely. They dreamed of true love and often found it in a carbon copy of a generic prince.
They were not heroes on horseback or girlbosses strutting their way out of dire situations. They didn’t confront their abusers like Rapunzel, didn’t fight in wars like Mulan, and didn’t work several jobs to achieve their dreams like Tiana. They didn’t preach about not needing a man to save them, and they weren’t considered feminist icons. They were softer, sensitive, graceful, and above all, feminine and ladylike.
There is often a concern that these kinds of princesses are promoting the wrong message to young girls. By watching a movie like Cinderella or Sleeping Beauty, parents worry that their daughters will become indoctrinated into learning that marriage, or a man choosing you, is the end goal. It isn’t an ill-founded concern necessarily; it’s easy to spot outdated gender roles in older Disney movies.
I used to agree with these concerns. When I was growing up, Fourth Wave Feminism emerged in the mid-2010s, and the #MeToo movement dominated my middle school years. I joined in on the conversation online that bashed the princesses I grew up watching, and equated their feminine qualities with weakness.
It was only when I got the chance to play Ella in high school that I approached her story differently. Her unwavering belief in the goodness of others allows her to find someone that loves her and treats her with respect. Her helping hand is what makes the Fairy Godmother wish to help her in the first place. The magic in the story only happens because Ella is kind.
Kindness is not what makes Ella weak; it marks her as one of the strongest characters in the story. Strength doesn’t always mean saving an entire country like Mulan or shooting arrows for your own hand like Merida in Brave. Sometimes strength looks like putting on a smile for others, even when you’re hurting inside. Sometimes it’s knowing that another harsh day awaits you, but getting up and putting on a brave face anyway. And sometimes, it means asking for help.
When I was a child, I was shy, quiet, and kept to myself. I was often found with my nose in a book, listened to Stephen Sondheim musicals and blues bands at home, and was obsessed with wearing kooky headbands that were as big as my head. I was textbook definition of uncool. I grew up wishing to find friends and that one true love the movies promised me, not because of all the frivolous things that came with dating or marrying someone, but because the idea of finding someone who accepted and loved me as I am felt like a faraway wish on a star.
I also never liked to ask for help. Always more concerned with the thoughts and feelings of everyone else before my own, I was the kid who never wanted to tell on a bully out of fear, or share my woes out of concern that I’d make everything about myself. I wanted to be the person you could rant to and rely on, but would be that person at the cost of my own mental health. As a child, the Fairy Godmother was magic I desperately wanted to be real.
When I was cast in the stage show a few months ago, I rewatched the 1950 and 2015 versions of the story. When watching the cartoon, I was so touched by this scene above that I almost shed a tear. Cinderella has finished her night at the ball, her carriage has turned back into a pumpkin, and she’s in tatters and rags holding a single glass slipper. All she can say, is “thank you.” I assumed that this is to the Fairy Godmother, but as she looks at the sky, it’s as if she’s thanking the universe for bestowing her one night where she can be herself.
I can understand as an adult why I loved the character of Cinderella so much. Cinderella is for children like me who believed in magic, cherished memories, and daydreamed about a better tomorrow. She wanted to be listened to and seen. She wanted a romanticized life and someone to love her. She wanted to have one night where she felt beautiful and confident. I wanted those things too.
Being in the show again has afforded me the opportunity to get back onstage, which has been fun, but it has made me look outside myself, as if watching myself in third person perspective. The confidence I have, the ability to connect with others and make friends, the relationships I’ve built by being in this show; they’re all things that would make little-me very happy.
The best part about being in this show is seeing all the young girls and boys in the audience watching with fascination. It’s so lovely being a part of a show that promotes goodness and magic, and I’m glad to know that this isn’t the first or last time Cinderella’s story will be shared with young ones, reminding them to have courage and be kind.
“Ella continued to see the world not as it is, but as it could be, if only you believe in courage, and kindness, and occasionally, just a little bit...of magic.”
- Fairy Godmother (Cinderella, 2015)
Thank you for reading. I hope you are taking care of yourself! I appreciate you <3
Lillian
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